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The Way Home

Part I - Personal Crisis

Before I knew it, I found myself reaching conclusions in three areas:

1) The Bible was eternal in nature and impacted society,

2) Creation science, with evidence in real science, revealed that there was an Intelligent Designer, the cause for intelligence, pattern, and beauty in the world around us, and

3) Biblical prophecy, as verified by ancient history and archeology, revealed that the Bible was accurate and that Jesus was who He said He was.

My conclusions were bringing me to a point of crisis. I remembered the vow that I had made and I knew I had the necessary information to act. But I was not acting! I was the very thing that I hated. I hated hypocrisy and I was not responding to what I now believed was the truth. There was dissonance and tension in my soul. I was a living, breathing, walking hypocrite. I wanted to act, but I did not know how to respond to the information I had.
In desperation one evening, I walked into my bedroom and cried out loud, “What am I supposed to do, what am I supposed to do?!” I quickly received an answer to that plea. I heard unmistakenly in my mind, “You need to ask Jesus for forgiveness.” And just as soon as that foreign thought entered my mind, I immediately rebelled. I recalled when I was a small boy and my mother had sent me to a summer Bible camp. A zealous camp counselor had told me about Jesus and told me how I should live my life. I remembered that I tried and could not do it; I could not live the Christian life which he proclaimed would be so good for me. It did not work then, so why would I want that now? I dismissed the thought as quickly as it came.
The following week I was more in crisis than ever. I became depressed and my work performance was so poor it was being noticed in the office. I had the truth, I knew how to respond to the truth, but still I was not acting on the truth. I was a hypocrite. The crisis deepened.